Ponders...

I have been thinking about life lately. Again? You may ask, lol. Yes, indeed. I always fail to comprehend why people often perceive life as something very complicated, continuing dwelling in matters which they regarded as "failure", dissapointment, turbulence... I have been dealing with negative people, perhaps that also include myself at times.

I am studying dissapointment in a close distance, but how could we get away from it? Except from overcoming it? Maybe by setting lower expectations? Isn't that failing to get the expected outcomes often set disappointment? Questions...which could have many possible answers. Many people are living with limitations of accepting their weaknesses. They like to acknowledge their strengths, but fear to speak of the weakness. But isn't part of us too? Our identity? If life is about mere pleasure, happiness then it's more like a programmed routine. There is nothing much to expect.

Confronting weakness could be quite a challenge, but effective to keeps things going more positively. Realising it or not, we live in all sort of cravings. You may be craving for ice-cream today, some may have craving on big money, posh cars, reputation, romance, achievements... All these cravings make people think they can't live without "them" anymore. Because these are what we defined as "goals" in life. Maybe without realising it we have actually lost conscious that these could be things we can live or live without.

I was reading this fact recently that more than half of the world population is living in poverty; living with no more than $2 a month. This means every 2 babies are born, 1 is destined to live in poverty. So many people died in disasters like the recent tsunami, earthquake. They become homeless, family less, goals less....at this point, what else matters? Apart from family and simplicity to live on. These people strive to stay alive with the basic; and amazingly everytime when I think about it, I am so grateful I am not the one destined to starvation and poverty. Everything I get in my life, is a bonus.

We all may define and live our life in our own sophisticated ways. But it's always important to add a little more contentment and gratitude into it. That could be the way to a more positive and constructive life. Besides, how would we know what is coming tomorrow? What matters is present, that's the moment you have control in.

老朋友

带着淡淡的回忆，
想起。。。
一起疯狂过，
一起哭过，
一起度过无数让人回忆的时光。。
啊，老朋友。

现在，你们都过得还好吗？
真怀念和你们在一起的日子。
成长是不是也把我们的快乐和天真带走了呢？
希望带走的不是我们的友谊。

无论你们在那里，
我都祝福你们。
快乐，幸福。

30th Bday

It just passed....that once in a year big day. None of my family or relatives nor him is around...but it was ok. It was just another day in your life I guess, but a day to ponder about, to be grateful. As usual, parents forget about it again haha, I guess when you get older this is what happened, perhaps. I gave some treat to myself, as usual for every year, and am planning for something bigger for next year. But I guess all I want is something pretty simple, my wish before blowing the candle last night was "i wish i have a happy life"...just that. Life could be simple...and it is simple anyway, I believe. Gratefulness is an attitude to life. and thanks people around me for making me special.

The beginning

Time seems to fly. It's 12th September to date, I feel I am still in trance...and...it's almost October! Maybe some little celebration for myself, get myself some nice presents. I have found my new "target" for birthday as usual, but not sure of the price as yet. I hope it won't cost me a bomb! Or maybe a dynamite!

There seems more plans to be materialised and I am working on them. I can sense good things are coming...though not extremely sure how "good" the content may turn out to be. Working life is alright, nothing too exciting, nothing too stressful, it's just fine, at least at this very point. Not sure what to hope for, just lazing and see what's next, I guess, life's good and am enjoying it. :)

家

突然想起，小时候很喜欢唱的一首歌，

“我想要有个家，一个不需要华丽的地方，
在我疲倦的时候，我会想到它。
我想要有个家，一个不需要多大的地方，
在我受惊吓的时候，我才不会害怕。
谁不会想要家，可是就有人没有它。
脸上流着眼泪，只能自己轻轻擦。。”

这旋律不断的在我脑海里，
我突然有些感触。
有着一点的伤感，
想起了我的家。

我的家，
它不嫌弃我的不足，
它接受我的过错，
它给我爱，给我温暖，
抚养我长大。

试问天底下，还有什么地方像家？
我好想家。。
想念妈妈的呵护，
想念爸爸的教导，
想念弟弟的吵闹，
想念婆婆的唠叨，
原来，这就是幸福。

我累了，
想回家了。

我领悟到，
累了有家回，真好！

快乐的意义

这是献给我关心的人。希望你们幸福。

快乐与否，
你选着了哪个？

小时候，“快乐”这两个字，
不过是个容易写的形容词，
有什么了不起的。
快乐不就笑嘻嘻，
不快乐就苦包脸，
童年啊，
何必思考这么多？

渐渐的我发现，
快乐背后的意义，
哪有这么容易看得透。

小时候，
我们因为自己而快乐，
我们以自己的成就为荣，
不知在我们成长的哪个阶段，
我们开始把快乐建立在别人身上。

小时候的天真已逝去，
我们的想法也改变了，
我们开始变得自私，我们开始对我们的主见执著，
我们开始变得无理，我们开始建立快乐在别人身上。

好像全世界的人都欠了你似的，
他们可有责任去负责你的快乐?
这是习惯性的犯错吗？

我们常因面子，自尊，任性而毁掉快乐，
那样不值得的错，你还再犯吗？

快乐不应该是要别人符合你的要求。

你可了解原来，
快乐是需要自己掌握的。

这么简单的道理，
你看透了吗？

Finally...

15th June, was the day. A decision wanted to be made for long....I wonder if I would ever regret what I have done, but until today, a month has passed. I very much feel that I have made the right move. I don't really know what is right; neither what is wrong. Maybe there is no definite answer either, it's just how we choose the path of live, isn't it?

Now, I am on a very laid-back and untaxing mode. Not much stress on work, everything seems in control, or it's just a lacking feeling of ownership since I am leaving? Neither motivated nor demotivated, I just feel neutral but still trying to give the best in whatever tasks I am doing now. There is a mixture of feeling which I can't explain, yet am trying to accept things in life with equanimity and composure.

I can't see clearly what is exactly infront. I can't say that I am extremely happy about the new job. I can't guarantee that it may not be another stepping stone. Confused with some personal issues, I am back to the point where, I am not exactly sure of the direction of my life. On my plate, I am not as yet bound with incumbrance. So, what is the next level? Get a condo? Go into investment? Wonder where would I be in another 5, 10, 15 years?

Anyway, regardless what the future lies, I am still in my happy disposition, am I?? I am always cheerful and goofy, or should I say I always loook cheerful and goofy. The least I hope, I am not lying to myself that I am having a felicitous life.